🟣 My worst enemy is myself. I compare myself to my own potential, not others.
🇧🇷🇫🇷 Mariana Mergulhao, 31, Brazilian-Paris-based bookworm & investing expert on a mission to make space for women in finance.
Three short stories, just from last month:
👉 I’m talking to a dad in front of my son’s school about my work. Two hours later, he sends me a WhatsApp message suggesting I read a book “that will help with my research.” It’s The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel. Such a good book I refer to all the time but should I send him a photo of the 32 other books on financial psychology I have in my library?
👉 A friend’s husband, who knows perfectly well what I do for a living, spends an hour explaining to me like I’m a child the difference between gambling, trading, and investing (he’s a graphic designer). On top of working in investing and personal finance, I also spent 8 years doing research on gambling and gambling addiction.
👉 I get a message from a behavioral finance specialist at a major French bank telling me I made a mistake in my (French) Snowball Thérapie newsletter. I mentioned a cognitive bias, but apparently, that’s not its correct name. Now, I love when people suggest edits. Feedback on my newsletters is not only essential, it shows people are reading and engaging, and I’m all for that. Plus, like everyone, I make mistakes and I talk about the importance of mistakes in almost every newsletter. But in this specific case, I didn’t make a mistake. He got the English translation wrong. It happens! But a little “ah, my bad” would have been cool.
And I’ve got a whole Notion page full of similar examples!!
Should we compile our stories and create the longest list of financial mansplaining in the world? 👇
So imagine my delight when I got invited on the (French-speaking) podcast Cash Confidences to talk with their hostesses, Mariana Mergulhao and Anna Logacheva about:
➡️ Carving out a space as a woman in the world of investing
➡️ Dealing with condescending comments and standing your ground
➡️ Investing as a foreigner: the challenges and how to overcome them
The Cash Confidences podcast is all about empowering women to claim their place in the world of investing. Together, Mariana and Anna are shifting mindsets and giving women the seat they deserve at the investing table.
That’s why I’m excited today to introduce an edition of the Money Feelings Questionnaire, the most detailed (and, as I’ve been told, “so much fun!!”) money psychology survey out there, where we’ll dive into the money habits, psychology, and philosophies of 👇
NAME: Mariana Mergulhao
AGE: 31
FROM: From São Paulo, Brazil. Living in Paris, France
ASTRO: Gemini! Moon in Leo, rising in Virgo.
LOVES: I love reading books (in paper!), traveling (over 30 countries visited), learning new languages (currently learning German), spending time with my family and friends (I've known my best friend since we were 6 years old), having breakfast (favorite meal!), and Brazilian culture (especially how people hug back home 💛).
MISSION(S): I am passionate about women's emancipation in society, with a mission focused on promoting financial independence for women. The lack of financial independence for so many women can lead to staying in unhealthy relationships, experiencing a lifestyle downgrade after divorce or retirement, and missing out on fulfilling dreams and opportunities that life presents.
JOB(S)/PROJECT(S):
Cash Confidences Podcast co-host
Co-founder of the Challenge Cash Confidences, a program to support women to start investing in France.
🎧 To listen to the podcast (in French): Cash Confidences Podcast
📲 To follow Cash Confidences sur LinkedIn: @cashconfidences
💃 To follow Cash Confidences on Instagram: @cashconfidences
SURPRISE(S): I can dive with sharks 20 meters underwater, but I can't drive a car in the city. I can run 10km, but I don't know how to whistle. I hate eating beans, even though it's one of the most traditional foods in my home country.
🟣 Which types of purchases do you tend to buy impulsively? What is your péché mignon? Books
🟣 What is one positive thing about your money behavior?I started investing early.
🟣 Which one of your money habits do you suspect annoys your partner/family/friends?Sometimes I try to save a bit too much, annoying some friends. 🫣
🟣 How do you feel about talking with others about how much you make, navigating raises, or the stress of job negotiations?✅ Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”
🔘 Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”
🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”
🟣 Do you ever catch yourself saying things like, 'Investing is just for smart people,' 'Math was never my thing, so finance isn’t for me,' or 'I’m just not good with numbers, so why even try'?🔘 Yes
🔘 Occasionally
🔘 Not often
✅ No
🟣 Celebrate the wealth you already have by finishing this sentence: "I feel rich because..."I'm healthy, I have friends and family who I love and love me back, I'm financially independent, and really enjoy the life I live.
🟣 What's a purchase that brought you lasting joy?A flight to Brazil.
🟣 You just won the lottery. What is the first cause you support?More financial education for women, especially those suffering from domestic violence.
🟣 When did you last feel financially envious of someone close to you?To be honest, I'm not an envious person. I don't usually think about others in a comparative way. What I compare myself to most is my own potential and how I could do better. My worst enemy is myself. 😓
🟣 Does your spending style resemble your parents, or did you rebel?Yes, a lot.
🟣 Do you ever notice when you're spending because of emotions, rather than because you actually need something?✅ Yes
🔘 Occasionally
🔘 Not often
🔘 No
🟣 How do you feel talking with others about how money worries impact your mental health or trigger anxiety?✅ Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”
🔘 Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”
🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”
🟣 Who handles the finances in your home?Me, myself, and I.
🟣 Do you ever find yourself saying things like, 'I never have enough money,' or 'I can’t afford it,' even though you have savings, access to money if you needed it, or own more than one property?🔘 Yes
✅ Occasionally
🔘 Not often
🔘 No
🟣 Is there a money habit of someone you know that secretly drives you insane?Friends with good salaries who spend everything without investing.
🟣 Were you told you were not good at math as a kid? Has it affected your ability to handle money matters? Has it affected your confidence to handle money matters?No, and math was actually my favorite subject as a kid. It definitely helped me feel confident about personal finances, but I think it’s such a shame to still associate the two. You don’t need to be good at math to be good with personal finances—you can use Excel for that.
🟣 What or who’s your vision of financial success?Earning more each month than your lifestyle requires. It is simple math: make more than you spend. However, that doesn’t define life success or happiness—those are separate topics, even if financial stability helps.
🟣 Do you find yourself living on credit cards, constantly in debt, but still giving money away even when you know you shouldn’t?🔘 Yes
🔘 Occasionally
🔘 Not often
✅ No
🟣 What are a couple of common sayings or proverbs about money in the country/ies you're from?“If we must cry and suffer, at least do it in Paris.” – I guess I took it literally. 😂
🟣 What’s your go-to ‘quick fix’ when you’re feeling down? Is it buying something? Food? If so, what kind of food? Is it scrolling? Or is it something else entirely?Chocolate 🍫
🟣 What are your thoughts or feelings about the idea that "health is better than wealth"?Partially agree—both are closely connected. In a highly unequal country like Brazil, wealth can provide access to private healthcare and top professionals, significantly improving quality of life.
🟣 Break your financial habits into three categories:
"Stop": One habit that no longer serves you
"Start": One new habit you'd like to build
"Continue": One habit that is working wellStop buying books (at least until you finish reading the ones you have).
Start considering ESG in your investments.
Continue investing.
🟣 What would be on your dopamine menu?*
*your own curated list of activities that give you a boost whenever you need it, which doesn’t involve scrolling and buying.You can find an example and more information here.
Working out.
Reading a book
Eating my mom's food
Spending quality time with the ones I love in my hometown.
🟣 If you could time-travel and stop one money-related mistake, what would it be?Not buying bitcoin a lot earlier.
🟣 What steps have you taken in planning for your financial future?🔘 I haven’t started planning anything
🔘 I think I have started but not sure
🔘 I’ve done some but not enough
🔘 I had but my situation has changed
✅ I’m on top of it & review regularly
💜 Thank you for sharing with us, Mariana.
And kudos to you 🫵 for dedicating these past few minutes to your financial self. Exploring others’ money habits, psychologies, and philosophies is a great step toward making financial conversations a regular, comfortable part of your life.
If you enjoyed this piece, just let me know by clicking the heart 💜 below or the restack button (the recycle symbol that lets you share this session with your followers).
I notice and appreciate every single one of them.
To join our next session, you can always sign up as a free subscriber, but a paid subscription gives you access to the upcoming No Buy Challenge, all the tools, a chance to unplug with off-screen exercises, and discounts for professional help…
See you in two weeks, or sooner on Notes.
Pauline 💜
A great read as always! If you're ever in need of someone to interview for this series, I would love to participate :)
Mansplaining strikes again!