🟣 Do You Eat or Spend Your Emotions?

🎤 And the Money Feelings of the fertility diet coach and writer of The School of Food, Bianca Osborne.

📣 Two surprises in the Paid Corner: A discount on Vestpod’s step-by-step investing BootCamp + a 14-page guided reflection to decode your shopping impulses.

When things aren’t going well, do you eat?

Do you spend?

Both?

Something else? What is it for you?

For me, it’s eating.

Some weeks, I behave. Some months, even. And then I enter a phase where I put the kids to bed, and the moment they’re asleep, I raid the fridge.

I’m not hungry when I do this. Sometimes, I eat until my stomach hurts.

And it drives me nuts. Because of course, I know better. I’m no nutrition oracle, but I know you shouldn’t eat when you’re not hungry and that an apple is a better snack than half a Galette des rois.

But knowing isn’t enough, is it?

It’s the same with money.

We all know the basics: Spend less than you earn. Save for tough times. Plan for the future. But knowing doesn’t mean doing.

So why is it that food and money, two things we navigate every single day, are the areas where so many of us become experts in self-sabotage?

Because these choices aren’t just about logic or knowledge. They’re about psychology. Emotions. Brain chemistry. Every decision we make about food or money runs through a messy filter of cognitive biases, deeply held beliefs, past experiences, and sometimes trauma, whether it’s ours or inherited.

The parallels are everywhere:

• Stress eating | Retail therapy

• Diet culture | Extreme budgeting: “No spending this month.” “No sugar starting tomorrow.”

• The taboos.

• The cycles of impulsive decisions followed by regret.

And here’s the thing: food and money aren’t just similar, they’re connected.

Financial stress, one of the biggest sources of anxiety, can weaken our impulse control and trigger poor eating habits.

Economic struggles limit access to healthier food options.

An unbalanced diet, or plain hunger, clouds our judgment, leaving us vulnerable to quick dopamine hits, whether that’s junk food or impulsive shopping.

We’re told to HALT and ask ourselves if we’re Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired before we shop or eat.

Exploring this link matters because it lets us transfer what works in one area of life to another (flexibility, introspection, diversity, compassion, visualizations). It also fosters empathy. Someone struggling with money might have the same underlying challenges as someone struggling with food.

And our relationship with food and money? It’s lifelong and we’ll need to make decisions about both every single day so understanding them isn’t just practical, it’s transformative.

🍽️ Here’s what’s on today’s menu:

💜 The Exercises: A guided reflection to determine if, when, and why you shop on impulse (with tips to take back control—helps with food habits too!).

🟣 The Reading List: My favorite resources for exploring the fascinating connections between food and money habits.

🟪 The Questionnaire: The Money Feelings of Bianca Osborne, the fertility diet coach and writer of The School of Food.

💜 The Exercises.

🟣 What are three things you’ve regretted buying impulsively last year? How much did it cost you (roughly)?

🟣 If you had to choose just one emotion that makes you hit ‘buy now’ the most, what would it be?

🟣 What’s one larger goal that you could achieve if you redirected your impulse spending? Is it travel, debt repayment, investment, or something else?

If you want to get much deeper

The Money Feelings Workbook chapter on Impulse is now available here for paid subscribers. It’s a 14 pages guided reflection to help you:

• Assess if impulse shopping is an issue for you and to what extent.

• Identify patterns in your spending habits.

• Uncover external and emotional factors behind your behaviors.

• Visualize the benefits of overcoming your impulse shopping.

• Brainstorm practical solutions adapted to you.

• Plan specific steps to put your intentions into action.

Most of the questions and exercises were helpful for my food habits, too!

💜 The Reading List: My favorite resources for exploring the fascinating connections between food and money habits.

👌 This edition of the Substack newsletter Two Percent by Michael Easter on how Ozempic is changing food purchases.

👌 This research article on the socioeconomic inequalities in the healthiness of food choices.

👌 This piece from the Financial Times on whether wealth can buy health.

👌 If you read French, this piece I co-authored with French nutritionist Charles on five challenges and five tools dietitians and financial advisors share.

👌 This edition of the Substack newsletter The Ladybird Purse by Keris Fox on the relationship between food and money (among other great things).

👌 This Refinery29 article on how eating disorders can make us broke.

🟣 This Money Feelings sesh on compulsive purchases (includes the test: Do You Show Signs of Compulsive Buying?).

🟣 This Money Feelings sesh on (shopping/food/any other) addiction (includes three exercises from addiction specialist Dr. Anna Lembke).

Let me know if some of these pieces resonated with you or if you have others to suggest to us all.

🟣 Le Questionnaire: The Money Feelings of Bianca Osborne, the fertility diet coach and writer of The School of Food.

NAME: Bianca Osbourne

AGE: A lady never tells ;)

FROM: Born and raised in Edmonton, Alberta Canada, now reside in Toronto

ASTRO: Cancer

LOVES: I am passionate about self-care - I love the spa, masks, self-development et al. I also love going to events, restaurants, and shows. That said, it's about the company I'm with during all of these activities that makes it so enjoyable.

JOB(S)/PROJECT(S): I help women bring the babies they dream of into the world through my work as a fertility diet coach. It's truly the calling of my life. I’m on Instagram and I write the School of Food on Substack.

SURPRISE(S): I've skydived. Bungee jumped. and sung in a big band.

🟣 What is one positive thing about your money behavior?

I generally live within my means.

🟣 Which one of your money habits do you suspect annoys your partner/family/friends?

I'm generally quite guarded about money, so nothing would annoy them, because they have no idea!

🟣 What do you picture for your retirement era (or the life you would like to lead when you no longer want to work or rely on work to sustain your lifestyle)?

I don't actually believe in retirement. I know how I work will change and evolve, but retirement in the traditional sense doesn't really look that fun. So I picture myself still serving women and health in some capacity, while also traveling with my future husband and child (I only want one lol).

🟣 How do you feel about talking with others about how much you make, navigating raises, or the stress of job negotiations?

🔘 Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”

✅ Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”

🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”

🟣 Do you ever catch yourself saying things like, 'Investing is just for smart people,' 'Math was never my thing, so finance isn’t for me,' or 'I’m just not good with numbers, so why even try'?

🔘 Yes

🔘 Occasionally

✅ Not often

🔘 No

🟣 Are you more envious of:(A) someone who is similar to you in most respects but is a bit wealthier (say 50% wealthier) or(B) more envious of Bill Gates?

A...I have no desire to be Bill Gates lol.

🟣 What's a purchase that brought you lasting joy?

It's hard to say, I don't really get joy from things that I've bought, but more from experiences and such that I buy with money - if that makes sense. So to that point, the last purchase was my flights home for Christmas, to see my family.

🟣 You just won the lottery. What is the first cause you support?

Alzheimer's association, or anything to do with the study of the brain.

🟣 When did you last feel financially envious of someone close to you?

When I was building my business and taking a non-traditional path, I often felt envious of my friends with corporate jobs. They seemed to have money while I was struggling financially. However, I soon realized many of them were burdened with tremendous debt and weren’t as happy as they seemed. The lesson? Never covet someone else’s life—focus on becoming the best version of yourself instead!

🟣 How would you feel sharing with others about debt, unpaid bills, or living paycheck to paycheck?

🔘 Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”

✅ Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”

🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”

🟣 Does your spending style resemble your parents, or did you rebel?

I was very similar to my mother; but I'd say now I spend according to my own financial identity.

🟣 When was the last time money stress had you wanting to scream into a pillow?

Years ago. It's just money, I refuse to let it give me wrinkles! That said, I also dissociate well, so if I'm having a money issues, I can separate it. But that's rare.

🟣 Do you ever notice when you're spending because of emotions, rather than because you actually need something?

🔘 Yes

🔘 Occasionally

✅ Not often

🔘 No

🟣 Do you pass the compulsive buying test?

[You can take the test here.]

Yes, I was 1.18.

🟣 How do you feel talking with others about how money worries impact your mental health or trigger anxiety?

🔘 Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”

✅ Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”

🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”

🟣 What are the core values that you want to influence your financial decisions?

Is it useful. Can I afford it.

🟣 Who handles the finances in your home?

Me...single gal in the city!

🟣 Do you ever find yourself saying things like, 'I never have enough money,' or 'I can’t afford it,' even though you have savings, access to money if you needed it, or own more than one property?

🔘 Yes

✅ Occasionally

🔘 Not often

🔘 No

🟣 Is there a money habit of someone you know that secretly drives you insane?

Spending recklessly and above their means.

🟣 Were you told you were not good at math as a kid? Has it affected your ability to handle money matters? Has it affected your confidence to handle money matters?

I was good at math but hated it - I didn't like how it felt mind bending. In my early adulthood I hated looking at money, it scared me because I didn't have it. Now I'm pretty good at facing the money stuff.

🟣 What are you currently craving to buy that you know you don’t actually need?

Honestly, there's nothing that I want that I don't need. I want new pots and pans, and I need them. I was a content creation camera, but I need one. I want new bedding, and it's time for some new ones. lol.

🟣 Do you ever catch yourself holding onto your money tightly, not spending it even when you could, and feeling like most people are just takers, always asking for more?

🔘 Yes

🔘 Occasionally

✅ Not often

🔘 No

🟣 How often do you find financial terminology and jargon confusing or intimidating?

🔘 Very often

🔘 Often

✅ Rarely

🔘 Never

🟣 What or who’s your vision of financial success?

My parents and my friends parents. They have homes or condos in the city and cottages outside of the city. Any comfortable boomer life is relatively aspiring.

🟣 Do you find yourself living on credit cards, constantly in debt, but still giving money away even when you know you shouldn’t?

🔘 Yes

🔘 Occasionally

🔘 Not often

✅ No

🟣 What are a couple of common sayings or proverbs about money in the country/ies you're from?

Money doesn't grow on trees. I am first generation Canadian, so times were tough for family when they first came to Canada, so being "good with money" is almost an obsession lol; but I get where it comes from.

🟣 What’s your go-to ‘quick fix’ when you’re feeling down? Is it buying something? Food? If so, what kind of food? Is it scrolling? Or is it something else entirely?

When something big and exciting happens at work, I always get takeout - either Middle Eastern or Indian food. I rarely order takeout, so this always feels like a treat.

🟣 What are your thoughts or feelings about the idea that "health is better than wealth"?

I think one begets the other. Being sick is expensive and will drain wealth very quickly. It's also hard to prioritize financial growth when sick. Conversely, when we are healthy we can grow and pursue our best lives; and thus build wealth.

🟣 Break your financial habits into three categories:
"Stop": One habit that no longer serves you
"Start": One new habit you'd like to build
"Continue": One habit that is working well

Stop: Waiting until the last minute to do my taxes.

Start: investing more seriously. I do invest, but I want to be more intentional this year.

Continue: to grow my business and thus my net worth.

🟣 What would be on your dopamine menu?*

*your own curated list of activities that give you a boost whenever you need it, which doesn’t involve scrolling and buying.

You can find an example and more information here.

Going to the spa. Going on vacation - even small weekend getaways. Dinner party or girls night with friends. On my dopamine menu is always something I either do with myself or with people I love.

🟣 What's a positive money experience that shaped your financial beliefs?

Digging my way out of debt and getting my credit repaired.

🟣 The zombie apocalypse is upon us. Which possession do you save?

Nothing. I'm not fighting, so I won't need anything where I'm going!

🟣 How do you feel confiding in someone about hidden debt, secret spending, or financial decisions you’ve kept private?

🔘 Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”

✅ Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”

🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”

🟣 At what age did you start having your own money? Did you receive pocket money, or did you earn it through work?

I always got an allowance but I'll be honest I was spoiled, so my money lessons were hard ones. My twenties were fun but I was always asking for money from my parents. I truly started having my own money around 31.

🟣 What emotions do you most associate with money? (3 minimum, more if it brings aaall the feels)

Nerves in the past. Excitement when I eventually started to make it. Now: Indifference - I've realized that money is energy, I apply emotions to it, so I can just easily not. I'm blessed that my needs are met, but having financial instability in the early days of my business taught me that having high emotions about money, doesn't serve me financially at all.

🟣 Find out the years you have to fund yourself between retirement and death by doing this quick math exercise:

[Age you die] - [Age you retire] = [Years you have to fund yourself between retirement and death]

[Take the Living to 100 Test to calculate your life expectancy and find out the retirement age in your country.]

Re: my above views on retirement.

🟣 If you could time-travel and stop one money-related mistake, what would it be?

I gave up a really great job opportunity in my early 20's that would have changed my money story in my 20's; that said, making that choice, led me down a path that had lead me here, so it all worked out.

🟣 What are your thoughts or feelings about the idea that 'Money is the root of all evil'?

Lies. If someone is evil or lacking in character and they get money, it expresses even more evil. But a good person with money, does good.

🟣 Would you rather stick to a strict budget or wear wet socks all day?

There's a nice middle ground that I like to dwell in. We only live once, but I still want to feel secure on this wild ride.

🟣 How do you feel about discussing complex feelings around inheritance or family financial support with others?

🔘 Open: “I’m comfortable talking about this openly with anyone.”

✅ Selective: “I’d discuss this, but only with certain people.”

🔘 Taboo: “This topic is off-limits—I’m not comfortable talking about it with anyone.”

🟣 What steps have you taken in planning for your financial future?

🔘 I haven’t started planning anything

🔘 I think I have started but not sure

✅ I’ve done some but not enough

🔘 I had but my situation has changed

🔘 I’m on top of it & review regularly

🟣 On a scale of 0 to 10, how bad is your addiction to subscriptions?

4...I have what I need; and I do a lot of sharing of passwords so I also have many that I don't pay for.

🟣 If your bank account could talk, what would it reveal is your greatest extravagance?

Ubers. But I calculated how much a car plus insurance would cost, and my uber habit still comes in hundred under the cost of car; so I feel good about it lol!

🟣 If you could magically double your income but had to work twice as hard, would you do it?

No. Work smarter, not harder.

🟣 Do you know how much your friends make in real figures?

No and I don't care, truly. I hope they are doing as well as they appear to; and if not, I hope if they need help- and I can help- they'd ask.

🟣 What's your favourite tool for managing your finances?

Good old spreadsheet - I don't trust apps with my data lolol

🟣 Who would you like to see on a new banknote?

Shirley Chisolm, an icon!

💜 Thank you for sharing with us, Bianca.

👏 Wow, well done for making it this far and spending time on your financial well-being.

If you enjoyed this piece, just let me know by clicking the heart 💜 below or the restack button (the recycle symbol that lets you share this session with your followers).

I notice and appreciate every single one of them.

See you in 2 weeks for our next session or sooner on Notes!

Pauline 💜